1. |
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MY NAME IS GLEN
MY NAME IS GLEN
MY NAME IS GLEN
MY NAME IS GLEN
AAAAAAHHH OOOOH-OOOOH
(repeat)
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2. |
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You ring the bell and step in
Take a look at the kitchen
no idea what is in store
Or what the camera is for
Welcome to Mike's Apartment
Welcome to Mike's Apartment
Why don't you sit on the bed
I'd like you to meet my friend
Take off your coat, and what's this?
A pair of spectacular tits
Welcome to Mike's Apartment
Welcome to Mike's Apartment
Negotiations begin
Price is so low it's a sin
I'll let you stay for the week
If you suck on Chuckie's dick
Welcome to Mike's Apartment
You are in Mike's Apartment
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3. |
Tight - Recycled
03:39
|
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I DON'T EAT THE FAST FOOD UNLESS I GOT THE VOUCHER
I SHIT AT WORK TO SAVE MONEY ON THE TOILET PAPER
I DON'T BUY THE CIGARETTES BECAUSE I AM A SCABBER
I SEE THE MOVIE ON A TUESDAY BECAUSE IT'S CHEAPER
MY ASS IS TIGHT
I RIDE A BIKE BECAUSE THE PRICE OF PETROL'S GETTIN HIGHER
I BUY MY SUNNIES AT THE STATION COS THEY'RE TEN DOLLAR
I DRINKS THE TOOHEYS COS IT'S CHEAPER THAN IMPORTED STELLA
I DRINK FROM SIX O'CLOCK TILL SEVEN COS IT'S HAPPY HOUR
MY ASS IS TIGHT
DON'T GO TO STORES TO BUY THE CD COS I GOT A BURNER
I GET THE MUSIC FROM MY FRIENDS BECAUSE I AM A PIRATE
I GO TO BALI TO MAKE BEATS BECAUSE THEY USE RUPIAH
I PUT THE COAL UP IN MY ASS, OUT COMES A DIAMOND
MY ASS IS TIGHT
IT'S TIME FOR A MOTHER-FUCKIN' SOLO
I DISAPPEAR LIKE A MAGICIAN WHEN IT'S MY ROUND FOR BEER
I CANNOT PAY YOU FOR THE MEAL BECAUSE MY WALLET'S NOT HERE
MY BOXER SHORTS ARE TORN BECAUSE I'VE WORN THEM FOR YEARS
IF I ONLY HAD A DOLLAR FOR EVERY TIME I HEAR
MY ASS IS TIGHT
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4. |
I Remember - Recycled
04:34
|
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She's done this kind of thing to you before
You're holding on to every little word that she says
You smell the Dolce and Gabbana in the air and you cry for her
A little piece of you dies inside whenever she leaves
You could pick up the phone and call her number just to try to work this out
Or go out, get drunk, get laid and move on
Right on
But this time, she's not coming back
She's changed her status to single on the internet
There is no point in trying to figure out what she wants from you
(she doesn't even know herself)
Just let her go because you know that it's already too late
You could pick up the phone and call her number just to try to work this out
Or go out, get drunk, get laid and move on
Right on
I remember how it felt the first time
and I won't let it happen again
I'm gonna learn from my mistakes
Yeah yeah yeah yeah
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5. |
Julie - Recycled
03:14
|
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Oh Julie you look so very fine
On your way to work, yeah you float on by
With your big brown eyes and your curly brown hair
Wanna hug you like a big teddy bear
When you walk by it feels so sweet
Why won't you look at me
I'm a real nice guy, I'm gonna make it one day
YEAH
If I won the lottery I'd buy you nice things
Like a puppy dog or a big diamond ring
Won't you look this way when you walk past
You smell so good like a bunch of flowers
Or expensive perfume
I'll take you to dinner
I know a nice place around the corner
They serve breakfast too
I know you like bagels
Cos I watch you from across the road when you eat them for lunch
Oh Julie when you swing those hips
Your legs go all the way up to your shoulders
You walk like a beauty queen or a runway model
I don't even know your name so I'll just call you
JULIE
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6. |
The Bulldog - Recycled
04:02
|
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I see the freaks walk by as the sun goes down
I feel the vibe is really heating up in this part of town
And when the horse rides through all the smoke and beer
I realise that I gotta get the hell out of here
But I can't
My legs are frozen and I'm starting to sway
The boys and girls are staring at me in a suspicious way
I try to finish this concoction of tobacco and hash but...
MY BRAIN IS MASH
I'm going insane here at The Bulldog
And I don't know what time it is
My face is melting at The Bulldog
And I don't know what time it is
And now their faces start to shift into a different world
And conversation has become something I cannot control
I need two sweet girls to walk me home
I need to be horizontal to be resting my bones
So I get under their umbrella and we walk real close
I don't let on that my umbrella's in my backpack so
They don't expect that I'm about to put my hand on their ass...
Who am I kidding I've been smoking too much grass
I'm going insane here at The Bulldog
And I don't know what time it is
My face is melting at The Bulldog
And I don't know what time it is
I just discovered that my brain is a miraculous toy
And it can take me to wherever I would like to enjoy
I know the scenery is FAKE but the feelings are true
And who cares, we're at The Bulldog - everything is cool.
EVERYTHING IS COOL
I'm going insane here at The Bulldog
And I don't know what time it is
My face is melting at The Bulldog
And I don't know what time it is
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7. |
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You take a mother-fuckin' chicken
and you throw it in a pot
You get yourself an onion
and you chop it all up
Fuckin' grab a couple carrots
two stalks of celery
One turnip, one leek
and one handful of fresh fuckin' parsley
(What herbs do we use?)
Picked fresh from the garden of grandma's bush
Cos it's TRADITION
(And what chicken do we use?)
Poultry fresh from Tony the family butcher
Cos it's TRADITION
Two litres of water to the boil
Skim off any of the scum that forms
Add your vegies with pepper and salt
Strain the broth into serving bowls
Nanna made soup for us nearly every week
Especially when she saw that I was in bed sick and
HUNGOVER
from the drinking that I'd done the night before
Had finally caught up now my head was fuckin' sore
(Where did we go every Friday night?)
We went to Nanna's every Friday with the family
Cos it's TRADITION
(And why did we always fight?)
Cos you always got more Matzo balls than me
You fuckin' prick
Hitler came in '33
so grandma moved from Germany
She brought all of her recipes
So now she makes this shit for me
You beat the shit out of two egg whites
Until they're stiff
Then you throw a couple yolks on into the mix
One cup of Matzo meal, with your salt and pepper
Then you throw that shit in your refrigerator
(What salt does Grandma use?)
She uses Kosher salt in all her cooking
Cos it's TRADITION
(And why the fuck can't we eat pork?)
Well I'm not a rabbi, but my guess would be
TRADITION
Roll 'em into balls and drop them into your soup
And let the balls simmer 'till they're all cooked through
Nanna's made this shit since she was five
And she probably will
Until the day that she DIES
Traditioooooon...
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8. |
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Good evening ladies and gentlemen
Right now I'd like to tell you a little story about an
ex co-worker of mine who used to make my work life a living hell.
Oh, you know the type - he's a balding prick
He's got that 'fat people' smell, you know
And he's angry at the world 'cos he's fat and he's bald
And he used to treat me like shit
Mmm-hmm
One day he says "Glen"
I said "What, Joe?"
He says "Step into my office"
And he shuts the door behind him and he says
"Glen I got a little news for you, kid. You gotta come in on the weekend"
I said "Oooh, Joe. Joey-Joe Joe Joe Joe.
As much as I'd love to drag my sorry ass in here on a weekend and stack boxes - nothing would make me happier, Joe. Honestly.
I got a few tiny little problems with that. Listen up.
a) I'm gonna be drinkin' very, very heavily this Friday
b) I'm gonna be very very hungover on Saturday and
c) FUCK YOU YOU FUCKIN' FUCK"
Oooh, that felt good
But you know this guy's always such a charmer with the ladies
Treats this guy like a sack of shit, but he always turns on the charm for the girlies
Personally I think it's only 'cos he's desperate for someone to suck his tiny little tripple-a sized battery dick
And he's always going on about this mysterious fiance
Some woman that hangs around with him after hours and can put up with his shit
I said "Joe"
he says "What"
I said "Maaaaan, I feel sorry for your fiance"
He says "Why?"
"She gotta FUCK YOU YOU FUCKIN FUCK"
It's just blah blah blah blah blah blah blah
Aaah... But you know, it's guys like Joe
They get a hard-on from giving the orders
He'll work there 'till the day that he dies
He's got no respect for the workers,
So why the fuck should I? You know?
One day he walks into the store-room
He says "Glen"
I said "What Joe"
He says "What is this? This is sloppy. Your work is sloppy"
I said "Ha! Sloppy? Well guess what? Your money sucks. Shove this job right up your ass and
FUCK YOU YOU FUCKIN' FUCK
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JUNK! Hong Kong
JUNK! is an audio-visual show like you’ve never seen before.
Seeing JUNK! is not like seeing any other band - it is a piece of performance art.
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